Friday, April 28, 2006 . 8:31 PM
said you were lucky when you found meim sorry i can't take it
why did you fake it
why did we kiss
lin jun jie
yesh he is stuck on my winamp and my head
this is evil i tell you
ha.
this is bad
ps: hey who is the nus librarian?! o man ... how dui lian >_<"
[headmusic]: down by lin jun jie
[quote]: two words: thank you
Tuesday, April 25, 2006 . 11:58 PM
26/4old song. same tune. same old shit.
im so tired it doesnt matter. you don't even read the shit i write anyhow. at least i think you don't.
::I need your arms around me
I need to feel your touch
I need your understanding
I need your love so much
You tell me that you love me so
You tell me that you care
But when I need you (baby)
Baby you're never there
On the phone long long distance always through such strong resistance
First you say you're to busy
I wonder if you even miss me
Never there
You're never there
You're never ever ever ever there::
i guess i tend to build my ego and my own resistence and barriers due to reasons like these. when i am around no one cares. when im not then after 1000000000000 years people start to notice. some care some don't. this really gets old on me. the old usual me will run ...
im spilling crap on this page though i seriously oughta be studying cause the thought just came across my mind. what the hell make YOU so fucking ass special.
i hate the inconsistency
i hate taking your hand then realising you want to put mine down
i hate trying to reach you via the phone
i hate thinking i have to plummed in with all the friends
i hate waiting in line for you to decided to pick up that phone when i have been waiting all freaking day long just for you
i hate telling not telling you everything
i hate your care not care attitude and you distancing me
i hate sitting here by myself
i hate running after you
i hate waiting just to tell you about my day.
i hate forcing you to try to listen to my day
i hate getting angry with you
i hate the work, but i hate you not being there with me
i hate knowing though you are online i am semi afraid to msg which makes no sense at all. seriously why the hell should i fear?
i hate fearing you telling me your busy otherwise not free
i hate myself for being so sheepishly dumb BUT ..
i hate Y.O.U the most
i hate this most cause i swear you don't even know its YOU im talking about
(seriously, i bet you don't even realise when you are reading this. do you even read at all?)
i get so tied up and so unravelled by your shit i don't know what to do.
(editorial note:i had to edit certain things... im sorry my mind i a mess these days. i need some emotional support here. my cry for help.bear with me 27/4)
*********deep breath
okie..
just a note. nuthing bad happened to day. i had to lash out. nuthing happend that this person did... erm today. well .. its a long run thing. plus i think my brain needed to vomit out some stuff so i can take new things in.
kay about today,
actually nice things happend. erm. semi- nice actually. ran into ann at the mrt chatted, hearing about her gg for some hot date! sighz. why does she get all these weird hot dates... tsk. anyway, then met miss a and went for din.
found a nice place near bugis and sat down drank abit, read, and played cards
the place was nice. im glad we went. think she was dyinggggggggg of exhaustion but she ren for me. i appreciate it. thanks.. :)
[head music]: sorry by jay chou
[quote]: sometimes you just make my day without even knowing it
and sometime you just fuck it up
27/8:
tiring day. paid a super duper power mama library fine! im still sulking
i know its my darn fault. can i at least complain?
okieee.. tired. too many books, too little time. i wish for someone to cheer me on havent felt much drive lately. drop me an sms yeah?
gdluck to all the peeps mugging.
im dyingggggg~~~~ keep getting cheated
by uncle dennis that he is going to bring me to a pet shop. made me put on hold buying food for chin chin and keep having this horrid stored hope that i could get a dog/ go view dogs.. sigh. what a crock and sham mister! o man .. this is why i HATE guys. arghz. disgusting liars
anyway shant delve in blaming the opposite sex all day ..
i hear chin chin kping outside
think he wants out.
he's been keeping me company stardying in the office ever since i got him
wonder would he catch cold cause hot / cold all day. hmmmm... i think i am falling sick though. suffering the sniffles. kinda need tissue even now.
just d/led some shakespeare stuff. so dead i need to read asap!
prob go lib tomolo. i keep procrestinating! so bad ! hmmmm... better snap outa this shit and focus..sighz
okie gtg.
gotta go check out her first day of work~
so far all i hear is : BORED.
hmmm... this is why i hate office jobs. waste my time.
::One two, princes kneel before you, that's what I said now
Princes, princes who adore you, just go ahead now
One has, diamonds in his pockets, and lots of bread now
This one simply wants to buy you rockets, hangin in his head now
Yeah, ( do-be-do's)
This one has a princely racquet,
That's what I said now
Got some big symbol on his jacket,
Ain't in his head now
Marry him your father will condone you, how 'bout that now
You marry me, your father will disown you just go ahead now
Marry him, or marry me, I'm the one who loves you baby can't you see I ain't got no future or family tree but I know what a Prince and lover ought to be
I know what a Prince and lover ought to be
So If you, want to call me baby, just go ahead now,
And if you'd like to tell me maybe, just go ahead now,
If you wanna buy me flowers, just go ahead now,
and If you'd like to talk for hours, just go ahead now::
[head music]: still two princes by spin docs (going on for days..urgh)
Sunday, April 23, 2006 . 11:28 PM
feeling restless..yesterdae there were last min plans to catch a movie: where the truth lies
met leo and peggy at rocky's sub-branch and said hi then rushed off. only to realise that all earlier tix were sold out expt the really late ones.
watched the show. stupid me made us late
stumbled in and stumbled out equally dazed.
couldn't help laughing cause i couldn't figure out what the hell was happening .. even now. im still suffering the "huhh?", "but why?" syndrome. miss a blames me of course. sighs. sorry ..
sorta hung out with her
i know we shop and walk quite abit but to "hang out" .. hmmm..
its been awhile
told her about the dumb things which were just going thru my mind
abt family, houses, school, plans for later, work ... the list goes on. im glad after so long she still was interested or at least acted interested to hear my naggings and me complain about my dreary life. i am not very interesting.
up to now
i am still fuming i lost to a person with a spoilt back in hopscotch!
angry. haa.. stupid can doesn't roll well. ahhh .. okie plus i stink at such games
it was fun.
most fun i had in a while
thanx
[headmusic]: to be with you by mr big
Saturday, April 22, 2006 . 9:07 PM
bought myself a small furry friend today (erm.. well semi-small... size friend)as usual typical me was surfing online waiting for sexy to get back to me then i was looking at adoption pages. bought chin chin from this indian boy called jonny via the internet. (erm ... if you havent guess by looking at the name .. yeshhh ! thats his name...erm well old name) and yes, chin chin is a CHIN-CHILLA!
@_@"
fuzz met me after a long wait and we went to get the chin.
huge cage and some food , water, bathing sand was given along with the chin. feel sore cause i have a huge whole in my pocket but happy that after how many years since the chinchilla craze is over i finally have one.
i told my ma about chin chin's EXISTENCE in the hse and as usual she did her double take.tut tut.
jonny, chin chin's previous owner gave him the name. i seriously seriously have to change it.hhhmmmmmmmmm.... still wating for miss a to suggest one. cant think at the moment. im just tired cause he was running all over my room and i had to chase as well as clean up after prince chin chin.haixxxx...
prince chin chin is a fur ball and a super duper speedy gonzalas.urgh
shall spend my bored days fatten him up :) haha such HUGE plans for him. maybe if he gets bigger and fatter he won't run so fast. yippee .. *evil grinz..
anyone who wants a chin plz contact/ tag me.my friend's friend is selling
price range $50-100++
kayz must study. **hocus-focus!
[headmusic]: i can't make you love me by george michael lemme give you 10 , 9, 8 ,7 , 6, 5 , 4, 3 , 2 ,1 chances what would you do ?
- probably crash and burn them.
south asia exam are over. sn1101e
horrible. all the questions came out as expected unfortunateli i mugged/ over-mugged till i suffered a case of brain freeze. really painful. came late for the exam by 10 mins , thickskinnedly held my head up high and strut in. whatever. i had to didnt i? o well its over ..
one down and 3 more to go
time table :
28th april shakespeare
29th april methods and practices (shall read this tonight)
3rd may cultural landscapes
okieeee.. so thats that
ate dinner at hongkong cafe a 1st for me
then headed to breko at bugis and stoned there for awhile. really tired. drank 2 heins cause i didnt know what to do or drink. perphaps i should have met the princess
shout outs:
nixx: heyyy you damn toot u didnt pick your hp where you die too ah. anyway, thx for surviving the tution man. jia you!
ka: i hope you fingers dunt walk off on you. haa. gdluck:) and congrates with the new shelf and broadband!! yipppeee.. haa.. im seriously celebrating for you lor
hu: wo hen lei
princess: perphaps , perphaps , perphaps ...
miss a: since when have you ever ever been afraid of me? >_<"
anyways... sexylady you owe me a chinchilla !!!
quick call me man. gotta settle this with yah. girl / rocky .. plz tell her im waiting for her. (i know you read this) yippeeee :)
im tired but im alright ..
yes
i really think i am
but i keep feeling something is missing. i've been saying to the rest. i am so tired these days. you never know who would ever ever wanna be there for you. and when you know it, they are just simply gone.what is the bloody use i ask you? none.
[headmusic]: you ougtha know by alanis morrisette
Tuesday, April 18, 2006 . 12:21 AM
when you need me but do not want mei'll be there.
but
when you want me but do not need me
that is when i have to go.
[head music]: stupid girl by garbage
Friday, April 14, 2006 . 11:08 AM
this is why i hate leaving..study hard fuzz
[headmusic]: you're gonna want me by tiga
[quote]: i wish you goodluck in finding me when the party is over
Wednesday, April 12, 2006 . 9:00 PM
And yesIt does get a little old knowing that you are there because the party isn’t.
And I got old, well older today
Was mugging for cybercrime final exams. MCQs but they were a horror bunch. My brain seemed a little dead today. Was yawning and shutting my eyes during the test. Wanted badly to stay focus but kept drifting off.
Felt tired knowing that everyone was busy
Too busy to eat
Too busy playing
Too busy studying
Too busy resting
All too busy, busy, busy, and me seemingly not. erm not in that sense.
Feel like I’m seriously missing out on something here.
I’m meeting apple and leo for drinks
Everyone has issues these days… something to drink to always
Apple’s hammie died . scare me I thought what happened to that silly girl. Sighs. Well its good that after so long we are meeting up. Even if it was for drinks.
Note: the fact that my conversation bores you is fine with me. The fact that you were so outright rude about it- is not. Sometimes it really is that hard to find someone to sincerely talk to especially when you had a terrible day
i search for beauty, brains and wit
and after that all i ask is time and patience
i realise that's asking too much
i should have stopped right there at beauty. (this is tentative till i actually meet one)
[head music]: none
Saturday, April 08, 2006 . 3:16 PM
my current obsession: searching online for dogsi think i've spent countless hours searching for that one particular dog
realise im been abit excess in my search
think i've been to every adoption site/pet rehoming scheme site
sighz
with shadow around i am happy
sadly i can't keep him
the mother disapproves so im trying my best-est to find she would like to have.
think im searching cause i am somehow a happier person too with a dog
makes me want to head on home and stay home.be good. i dunno. just me i guess.
perphaps i miss bob alot. maybe i just miss having a dog jump up and down at the sight of me when i come home. humans aint that nice. they won't jump up and down. they'd prob give you the third finger and walk away. haa..
okie. so here my plea to you people out there:
help adopt a dog. why not adopt mine?
if you stay and landed property hopefully have a garden and considering to have a dog (x lab retriever) plz give me a call or tag me. thanx
[head music]: my humps by blackeye peas
Friday, April 07, 2006 . 1:21 AM
"reputation, reputation, o my reputation!"let me stand before you
unabashed and unashamed
of who i am.
let me say this once so you can heard and digest
that i like the me that i see
even if you don't.
my qualities neither extravagant nor extrordinary
my beauty neither nor
none with truly matter.
just never insult my intelligence
nor belittle the shrewdness of my words
when i decide on cutting you up into shreds
or mean to forget.
in case you miss my point entirely
i just want to say that
i am happy.
[head music]: my happy ending by averil lavine
Wednesday, April 05, 2006 . 11:05 PM
where have all the gorgeous people gone?long time passing..
just a quick note to those who do not know me:
pls check your face before even walking within a 3 metre radius of me. keeps me from getting sore eyes. thank you very much.
shout outs
shadow: im so proud of you! you managed to "sit". finally.
min: o man! everyone keeps thinking your my bf cause of my msn pic! o my freaking god.... @_@ no offence.
k.a:where are you?
[head music]: sexy lady by shaggy
